Letting Go.

One of the biggest eye-opening lessons I had to learn. To Let Go…

I usually relate my emotional healing journal to romantic connections. In other words, most of my anxious episodes involve falling " in love " with someone or just attaching to them. (We will talk about attachment styles later.)

I realized it took me a long time to be able to let go of someone, even if they were hurting me. I would usually take pride in being the one who wanted to fix things and try everything before breakup, but I ended up realizing that not only did I hurt myself in that process, but I hurt others as well. See, not wanting to let go often relates to my obsession with controlling others and outcomes so that I can feel “safe”. It is why we need to work so hard on digging into our childhood and try to find out what about my childhood didn’t make me feel safe or which trauma is still lingering on the subconscious-controlling narratives I use as an adult.

First, I had to realize that letting go doesn’t mean abandonment. Then, I had to convince myself that I was enough. It was almost like I had to envision my inner child and calm him down from the multiple narratives we lived together growing up. Just that, we are not that version of ourselves anymore. We are stronger, smarter, and even more mindful.

That being said, I also thought letting go was about action. It was about closing my eyes and trusting I was making the correct decision. But it takes more than blocking someone or stopping acting a certain way. It requires a lot of responsibility to start an emotional journey to the healing we all deserve. Letting go is understanding that no one belongs to you, it is about bringing the focus back to you, it is about knowing your worth is only determined by yourself and your values. Letting go is accepting people do not change unless they want to, and most importantly, it is about valuing your peace of mind to know that the environment of chaos you grew up with, can’t be the same environment your higher self will thrive on.

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Lando